I held your gaze for just a moment longer this time
Held my inhale for an extra second
While our souls connected
I felt warmth in your gaze
And a feeling of home that I hadn’t felt in a long time
A really long time
It made me wonder if there was possibility between us
A beautiful happy future
Of hand holding
And soft kisses
Familiar laughs at inside jokes

I waited expectantly for a kiss
For that moment when all the confusion and fear would lift
When our lips touched awkwardly for the first time
And our melted breath sighed away in one satisfied cloud
Confirming the possibility that even broken people
Can somehow create a functional whole together

I waited for that moment
But instead, possibility evaporated into the cracks of our wounds
And darkness repossessed its throne
Whispering, ‘it’s too late
It’s too late for you’

Maybe false starts and half steps are the best we can hope for
Kindness and courtesy
Over love and belonging

I averted my gaze and stepped back
Remembering how dangerous hope can be
Never knowing that just as I’d stepped away
You had leaned in